Tourniquet
by rcf1989
Summary: A lot has happened between Bree and Katherine, and one day the latest can't take it anymore as she doesn't have anything left in her life. Will Bree be able to stop the tragedy? Katherine's POV.


_Playground schoolbell rings, again_

_Rainclouds come to play, again_

_Has no one told you she's not breathing? _

_Hello, I'm your mind, giving you someone to talk to... Hello..._

_If I smile and don't believe_

_Soon I know I'll wake from this dream_

_Don't try to fix me_

_I'm not broken_

_Hello, I'm the lie living for you so you can hide..._

_Don't cry..._

_Suddenly I know I'm not sleeping_

_Hello, I'm still here, all that's left_

_Of yesterday..._

Today is the day I took my last decision. I have nothing left in this world so why keep living lie after lie? I've been hurt so many times and my heart has been broken so much that it cannot be mend anymore, especially after the love of my life betrayed me several times. I was willing to forgive her but it was the last straw. There's no coming back from this. What's ahead of me it's of course unknown but I'll face it like I've faced everything new in life: with my best fake smile and the dignity I still have left.

After I baked the last lemon meringue pie in my life, the pie that broke all hell loose just a few days after we met, I run a hot bath. Before stepping in, I went downstairs to the kitchen and after a few minutes I chose my weapon: a short yet sharp kitchen knife that could cut the most fine linen with just a tiny movement. After all, that kind of knives are used by seal haunters to remove their thick skin.

Before I left the kitchen I heard a new incoming voicemail from Bree...

"Katherine... I'll be home as soon as I can..." Then I heard Karl yelling at her to get back but she yelled no because she was leaving and something that smashed near. "This is... This is crazy! I need to get out of here! I promise I'll be home soon, I love you."

I must say Bree sounded scared and Karl really mad... I guess she told him it was over or that it never was going to happen or who knows what, but also she sounded like she meant those words for me but... It was too late, I was not going to change my mind just because how I thought some words were understood.

I walked upstairs again, to my room... Well our room I should say, and got into the bathroom. I didn't care about locking the door as I was alone. I undressed and stepped in. The water was still hot so it was nice, and it still remembered me of the last time we bathed together... It was the previous night, the last we ever had and after all that's happened I still love her as much, if not more, as the first day I knew my feelings for her. My love's never ceased but grown over the past years for Bree, no matter what she's done to me.

Still the previous night was just wonderful, Bree was just taking care of me, prepared all and then we had that little bath together, and even made love while we were bathing and again in our bed; still I love the most how she used to hold me every night, lying next to her and how caring she and loving she was. And that's what I miss the most right now, her arms arround me.

As I'm in the bath, I remebered a few things about us like how we met, or how stupidly fought when we were together yet how we fixed it sortly after like nothing happened or those times any of us was down and the other did anything to cheer up the mood. Sadly, there's not going to be a cheer up time today, no more fights ever again because... It's over, just like my life.

After a while it started to get cold so I reached with my hand for the hot tab and run it, letting it flow until all feels hot again. The steam around the bathroom and the water falling down the tub into the floor and even going out into the bedroom. Then, that's when I took the kitchen knife and with my arms under water, I deeply cut my wrists. Slowly I managed to let the knife fall out of the tub and I laid back, with my arms still under water so that it wouldn't hurt me.

As minutes pass by, I felt more and more relaxed while the water's turning red due to my blood. And as it's mixed together it even reached the bedroom and a little puddle formed, like a warning of what was to be found: a woman who commited suicide because her lover betrayed her, after all they went through, and couldn't take it anymore.

I don't know how much time have passed, but I know at some point I heard the front door opening and shortly after closing, and then Bree's voice calling my name. Knowing her as much as I do, I knew she'd go first to the living room, where I left her a note explaining everything I knew and why I took my decision, which was explained simply as: I can't continue with this anymore, I love you much more than you will ever imagine and even if what I'm doing it's weak for some, it's the only way I can cope with it. You promised me everything I dreamed of and it was happening until... Well, you know what you did, and I still forgive you because of my unending love for you. Be happy Bree, with whoever that will be, I'll look after you and I will always love you.

I know, it sounded kinda sappy but can you blame me? She's the love of my life and well... She cheated on me after all... Goes to show I've never been good enough for anyone, so why keep living this life? I have nothing left so it's time to move on... Permanently.

After sometime, probably enough to reread a few times the letter, I heard Bree screaming my name and running around trying to find me downstairs until... Well she decided to go upstairs and the closer she was to our room the faster she walked until she stopped. I'm sure that puddle mixed with water and my own blood made her freak, well that scream she got out was obvious.

Bree was cursing and blaming herself for everything, after she got over the shock. I think she didn't imagine I was serious until she was standing by the bathroom door of our room and saw the scene: steam everywhere, water with my blood, that puddle on the floor by the door and me in the tub looking quite death already and with the water around me looking red.

She screamed again and run, carefully. She shook me a little trying to bring my back from my deathly trance but it didn't work. I was still more dead than alive. Then in an unBree like manner she got into the tub with me, yes still dressed, and held me and whispered lots of things I can't remember until she started to cry and held my tighter and closer to her.

Clearly she has never been that scared in her life, Bree even removed the sleeves of her blouse and tied them around my wrists to stop the bleeding, just doing a tourniquet. Slowly, it started to hit her what happened was just her fault, that she pushed me into that as she broke her most precious promise of all: never leave me, cheat on me and hurt me. She did, the worse way she could.

And then, like if I was talking to her, you're truly sorry of all you've done. Of all those times you stole from me; all those times you broke my heart, with your lies, seeing people behind my back thinking I'd never find out and you're now ashamed knowing I did know all along, after you finally process what I wrote in that note; for drinking again after all I did for you. And now's when you say crying:

"Honey, please don't leave me alone. Don't leave me. I love you and I'm sorry for all I've done; I don't know why I ever did it all when I had you and I treated you so badly. Forgive me..." Said Bree and got in the tub, again as she left for a moment to call an ambulance, with Katherine, to hold her almost dead lover. "I sent Karl away, it was a stupid mistake to hurt you that way after I left Orson for you. I never slept with him, it was just stupid and i knew it wasn't going anywhere, when I called you I was telling him there's never even been a beggining so it was over before it started and he got mad, and I only did it because we had a fight. I'm a horrible person and you still love me... When I can't love myself; I need you, to know someone still loves me and cares for me. I need you so my world will not crash down without you, to know I have someone next to me everyday and a reason to wake up every morning. Kathy, I love you, please don't leave me alone. We can be happy, I know we can because we both want to after all we've sacrified, screw everyone and let's be happy together. Just you and I. Please, come back and stay with me... I need you... Please... Don't leave me... I love you so much..."

And right then, as she told me everything, I took a look at her deep green emerald eyes full of salty tears and also a single warm tear decided to roll down my cheek, and then then I was...

Back.


End file.
